It’s the start of a new season: crisp breeze, golden leaves, and the hint of pumpkin and cinnamon exhausting our senses. Fall brings such joy to my spirit. It’s adds color and warmth to the world around me. But, my heart sinks as we let go of a summer with warm nights filled with dusky family walks and hot days full of sprinkler splashing and the permanent aroma of sunscreen.
With evolving seasons, comes the excitement and anxious awaiting of new beginnings and soon-to-be adventures, but a lingering sadness for the close of the season before. It’s catch twenty-two as the changes unfold.
The transition of seasons is mirrored in our journey as mothers. I, myself, am in this limbo state. My vivacious, endearing toddler embarks on the journey of independence and personality-forming, adventure-seeking growth. Simultaneously, he wants/needs his imperfect mama. He’s still my baby with infectious giggles, squishy palms, “wuv you’s,” and outstretched arms to be held at any given moment.
My mama heart breaks to let go of this stage when my purpose is to care for his every need. He depends on my presence and sanity. Yet, I’m eager to see what the next season holds as he loses his toddler attributes and permanently turns into a little boy. I immerse myself in his affection knowing (eventually) a time will come when he no longer wants to give sloppy kisses and throw his arms around my neck.
I’m loving this stage, but impatiently waiting to see who he becomes in the future. I long to not have days filled with dirty diapers, or cleaning the fifth mess of spilled milk and Legos week after week. I long for more personal freedom while soaking up his desire to “vroom” cars with me in the playroom. Each advancement in speech or learning swells my heart with pride. But there are days I long for quiet and time to sit and just be instead of relentlessly worrying over what to teach him next.
We are all in a transition of change: exhaustion but overwhelming love of mothering a newborn; the battle of puberty or teenage driving while watching them make some really great decisions and learn from a few inevitable poor ones; or saying goodbye and letting go as you send your adults off to college or watch them marry and have children of their own.
Regardless, Jesus eternally gives a source of encouragement when we’re dredging through the trenches. He offers a peace when our babies crawl into our laps or whisper “I love you.” He holds our hands with comfort on days we’re begging for a break. He’s also fist pumps with us when we experience our children growing, loving, and becoming into kind, amazing adults.
Mothering is hard, really hard. But if we let us ourselves soak in His presence during really wonderful moments, yet have confidence in His unfailing love during times of strife, we can better manage seasonal changes. He gives us the ability to leave one phase with peace and enthusiasm in what God has helped us accomplish, while entering the next season with anticipation, security, and joy knowing we can savor the fullness of future adventures for all they’re meant to bring. Each season holds growth and purpose through God’s merciful teaching and empathy. Never doubt your current season and what He has planned for the future. It may not be easy but He assures us it’s worth it.
God hopes to overwhelm our hearts with His compassion and grace. He wants our roots planted in His goodness and mercy, so we can grow to accept the challenges motherhood brings and enhance moments of elation with our children He purposely sends through a hug, kiss, or jump into our laps. His truth points us back to His desire to offer a life of freedom, purpose, and grace. A season full of that is all we can ask for…and maybe some pumpkin spice.
house of stain 